Michelle Anderson Picarella; Illogically Logical



Wednesday, April 3, 2013

The concept of Nothing Lasts Forever

Once upon a time,  this quote was the truest of true. Modern times have ran over this idea, backed up and ran over it again and again.

Before social media, it was like our lives were half written in pen and half in cheap pencil. Some things, some choices- lasted forever no matter how much we wanted to erase them, but luckily, a good portion of our life was penciled into what we consider our history. We might know the truth of the story of our lives, but the rest of the world would only see the clean edited version.

Many of us are parents, and as parents we push the importance of everything we post online being forever. We monitor to avoid them posting a rude status, a photo, a joke in bad taste that may haunt them one day. Sometimes, some of us forget how true this is in our own reality.

I have seen many people lately attempt to erase their past. Maybe they regret something. Maybe choices had to be made. Maybe their opinions on topics have changed- take me, five years ago, I was the most liberal of liberals the south could imagine. Now, I want guns and borders protected. I hold a lot of my "liberal" views, and likely always will on some topics, but now I just want to be an American. Still, if you research me, you are going to find some mighty liberal posts on various sites. They will be there forever. I don't hold shame in this. I love the me I was. I love the me that I am. I love the me I am becoming. I live my life with very little regret and at the times I said those things, I meant it. Even if I do not hold the same political opinions, I am not some hard head un-evolved blind straight ticket voter. I can see both sides and that, I like.

On the other hand, I also post personal things. This blog, twitter, facebook- I am me. I have a professional work blog for literary musings but as separate as they may be- both are still me. If a reader, a business prospect, a friend- if they google me, they will find all of my literary travels, but they will find my tweets and facebook- and this- a personal blog full of hopes, dreams, rants, heartbreaks and anything I choose to put out there.

I do not regret anything I have posted. Good for me. Really, especially on the realms of heartbreaks of recent times, I was sort of thrown to the wolves publicly anyway, and blogs became easier than endless amounts of one on one conversations of the ex that decided to play Find Waldo with the literary world. LOL.

I just as much do not regret posts about neighbors from hell, because somehow, I became blessed with neighbors that were nothing less than blessings. I do not regret any tweets or posts about fornicating chickens as I try to carry on business chats, because- come on, how many authors try to talk business and have to pretend like these birds aren't putting the chick in bow-chicka- bow-wow as conversations an even blog radio interviews get very professional?

On the other hand, some people DO regret choices made in what they have said on social media and blogs. They wish to erase it. Blogs, comments, even social media accounts are deleted to erase these things that cannot be undone, but the proof of it would be nice. Edited versions of life are always much cleaner.

But welcome to the new age. Where your life is no longer ever documented in pencil, a life where your rough draft goes straight to print. Social media has become a bar and the web is the tender you tell it all to and it listens well. Just like a bar, you tell that bartender your rants about work, friends, family. You tell that bartender how proud you are of your kids or how in love you are. You tell that bartender how ticked you are with the government and you give them your point of view on every subject. You leave, you sober up. You don't want your boss to know you hate them. You don't want to look your neighbors in the eye. You don't want your wife or husband to know you lay awake picturing life with someone else. You decide maybe all members of the opposite political party are not stupid. Either way, you didn't take these thoughts to confession- Sweetie, you took your thoughts and feelings to the web weaving internet bartender compiling a tell all story.

Erase what you can. Remove yourself from sites. Stop comments from being posted. Bartender was taking notes while you were taking shots. When he isn't tending bar, he is the conductor of the strongest steam powered search engines. The people can oogle on google or bada the Bing and find the weaved webs of the tales heard once by the bartender.

That post is deleted. Sigh. Relief. No regret. It isn't on a billboard, sure. But, my dears, it is written in this book, like an encyclopedia where all they need is the right name or keywords and every thought, rant, emotion, love, hate, passion, desire, annoyance- in dark ink- will always exist. Forever.

I am not saying to avoid posting the REAL you. I am a strong supporter of the REAL you. Anything less than is a fake version of a liar. And if you aren't true to yourself, you darn sure cannot be true to anyone else. Just remember, if you talk bad about someone, it is there. If you loved someone it is there. If you were once on one side of the fight and switched your point of view, the former thoughts are there forever.

Friendships may crumble. Jobs may switch. Loves may become forbidden, but the fact that at one time in your life, you felt the way you did will always be there. Your grandkids will search you and discover a you they never knew. Your bosses will search you and see what you said about a former boss. Your friends will reconnect with you and always hold resentment that at one point, you trashed them. The lovers of your future will know the lovers of your past. Relationships of any sort, professional or personal- Life situations, personal hells or fated destinies will end. Nothing lasts forever- except what you post about them.

Take a moment and search yourself. Search yourself with random keywords. Search for images. See all the things you have forgotten. One day, your kids and grandkids will want the stories behind these things. One day, they will likely contact the people they find you with on search engines. Do you suddenly feel like a kid hiding a diary?

Some things last forever.

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